2002-03 Broadcast Season
Broadcast Program Transcripts
Episode #1810
Adoption and Foster Care

Lewis: Mitchell Lewis, host
Amerson: Ruth Amerson, Another Choice for Black Children, Inc.
Horton: Earl Horton, General Baptist State Convention
Nelson: Adoptive parent
Vickie: Adoptive parent
Tyler: Nelson and Vickie’s biological child
Dennis: Adoptive parent
Eugenie: Adoptive parent
Anthony: Eugenie’s biological son
Letitia: Dennis and Eugenie’s adopted daughter

Voiceover: Coming up, adopting African-American children. That’s next on Black Issues Forum.

Voiceover: This program was made possible by contributions to UNC-TV from viewers like you. Thank you.

[THEME MUSIC]

Lewis: Good evening and welcome to Black Issues Forum. I’m Mitchell Lewis. According to statistics from the North Carolina adoption report card, over 50 percent of the children waiting to be adopted are African-American. On tonight’s show we’ll explore the reasons why the rate is so high among African-American children, as well as challenges facing adults who want to adopt. We’ll also discuss adoption programs that are available to educate potential parents and accelerate the adoption process.

But first, here’s the unique story of one couple capable of having children, but chose to include adoption in creating their family.

Nelson: What’s that stuff on Pooh’s mouth?

Child: Honey.

Nelson: Honey. He’s always in the honey.

She’s fully aware that she was adopted. She’s aware of us going to Tennessee to get her; as far as what that means, I don’t think that she fully understands that. She knows that she came from another woman’s womb and not Vickie’s, but at this point, there are no issues with that, and it’ll always be a part of her story.

Narrator: Although many choose adoption as a solution to infertility, infertility obviously was not the reason for Nelson and Vicki of Durham, who have a 10-year-old biological son and are pregnant with their third child.

Vicki: I think initially it was more something that I brought into the marriage, and said forever I wanted to adopt. This particular story came about as a friend told us about Holland, and we knew at that time in our life this was the right baby for us, and it was our time to adopt.

Narrator: Their method of adoption was as progressive as their reason for adopting, but not unusual for couples who adopt through private agencies.

Vicki: Open adoption actually hadn’t been one of our choices when we discussed it as a couple. When Holland’s birth mother made it a request, we looked into as exactly what would that mean for our experience, and decided it would be fine.

Nelson: Actually, the openness was more of a relief than a concern, because we know where they are, they know where we are; there isn’t this mystery of will this family come snatch the baby? We didn’t have that concern at all; it’s somewhat like an extended family to an extent.

Narrator: Nelson and Vicki have been equally open with their children about where and how Holland was born. It’s an approach that seems to be working.

Tyler: They’ll ask me if my sister was adopted, and I’ll tell them that we went to Tennessee when I was nine and we got a baby.

Narrator: It’s obvious Tyler and Holland couldn’t be closer. But how does the joy of adoption compare to the joy of giving birth?

Vicki: I’d say one of the biggest myths is, for someone who has biological children would be the question of whether you would love an adopted child like you love your biological child. And I could quickly say that that is indeed a myth and not true. It is the same experience.

Nelson: I would like to say that unless you’ve done it, then you can’t make that judgment. For us, it’s worked, it’s been great, adopting a child is just as great as having one. We’d like to thank you for doing this and getting the word out. There’s a lot of kids that are looking for loving families and would just be delighted to have a family to call their own.

Lewis: Tonight we have two experts to help give us some insight on the adoption process. Ruth Amerson is the founder and CEO of Another Choice for Black Children, Incorporated, based in Charlotte. Earl Horton is the director of public relations for Adoption and Foster Care Ministry for the General Baptist State Convention. And both of you, welcome to Black Issues Forum.

Horton: Thank you.

Amerson: Thank you.

Lewis: Miss Amerson, we’ll start off with you first. Now, the piece we just saw, it was a happy one, but there are still many African-American children awaiting to be adopted. Why is that? Are there fears out there, or maybe some myths out there about adoption that people should know about?

Amerson: Unfortunately, North Carolina is very much like across the country. Many agencies are saying that they can’t find homes for African-American children. That story that we saw is very, very nice, but the children who are waiting in the system are usually school-age children. They’re usually five and above, and they normally have brothers and sisters. So any effort we can get to educate the community about those kind of children is very, very important.

Lewis: Mr. Horton, what are some of the challenges that you’re facing within your ministry, within the General Baptist State Convention?

Horton: Well, some of the ministries, as far as some of the challenges that we’re facing, is basically trying to educate people within the faith community about what it takes to become an adoptive or foster care parent. Another challenge is, trying to get in contact with pastors and let them know that there is a great need of finding families within the congregation because a lot of the pastors do not know that there are families that are interested, but just do not know as far as the correct process or the correct avenue or who to get in contact with as far as in adoption or foster care. And within our ministry within the state of North Carolina, we travel to all one hundred counties and make presentations to the pastors and to the congregation, and once you try to break some of these barriers and some of these myths down, they really get a better understanding as far as what it takes to become an adoptive or foster care parent.

Lewis: Miss Amerson, the term “special needs” comes up a lot when it comes to adopting African-American children. Why that particular label?

Amerson: Unfortunately, in order to get federal funds, they have to attach a label to a child, and for families, they think “special needs” means they got two heads, fifteen arms, or look funny. But special needs means they’re a little bit older, it may mean they have brothers and sisters and we want to place them together, it may mean that they have a difficult time expressing themselves or they may have learning challenges. But these kids who are waiting are good children waiting for families.

Lewis: Now, in order to get the adoption process started, what needs to be done?

Amerson: Well, they can call Another Choice!

Horton: Or they can call General Baptist!

[LAUGHTER]

Lewis: Get your plug in! [LAUGHS]

Amerson: However, families generally have been thinking about adoption two to three years before they even pick up the phone to call. So once they make that call, it is important for what ever agency they select that they find out from that agency, What is your process?

With our process, we have a 30-hour class that’s mandated by the state of North Carolina. We also do finger-printing as mandated by the state; we do physicals, we do references; we want to make sure that the family is healthy and are able financially to meet the needs of any children that may join their family.

Horton: And if I may add in, as far as the difference in our program is that, is that, once we make presentations at different churches, and different conferences that we go to, we basically refer those families over to NC Kids, which is located in Greensboro, North Carolina, and from NC Kids, they will refer those families to public and private agencies and they will take over, as far as getting those families though those __ classes that Miss Amerson referred to.

Lewis: Now, what’s the difference between, say, the public and private agencies when it comes to adoption? Miss Amerson?

Amerson: Another choice is one of about three private agencies in North Carolina that specialize in finding families for school-age children who are in the child welfare system. In North Carolina, there are about 17 other private agencies who focus on infant adoptions like the one you showed you earlier. And their focus is on a different population of children who have generally not entered a foster care system.

Lewis: Mr. Horton, once the adoption process begins, does it move along quickly, or have you noticed that the process sort of slows down a bit? It seems like there’s not that sense of emergency there?

Horton: Well, it all depends. For one thing, it depends on the families as far as them completing the pre-assessment package. And also, as far as when the next [INAUDIBLE] training that’s available from the county social services. I know that’s two things off the top, as far as difficulty that I see, as far as families that I’m in contact with. Normally, as far as the [INAUDIBLE], it provides an opportunity for the family to learn a little bit about themselves and also about their children and their needs. Once they go through that process, they can get a better understanding if they are a better suited family for that child that they really want to have in their lives.

Lewis: Miss Amerson, we talked about myths earlier, and one myth is that, black families are just no available to adopt black children.

Amerson: They are! They are available—

Horton: There’s plenty.

Amerson: There are plenty of families. Unfortunately, what society, the general society is not aware that adoption has always been in our community. We have always taken care of children. It is estimated that there are about four million African-American children in all these families, through adoption. So, it doesn’t make any sense that public agencies are saying that we can’t find homes for a measly hundred thousand children. It doesn’t make any sense. Black families are out there, they are capable, they are willing, and given equal opportunity, they will adopt all these children who are waiting currently in the system.

Horton: Definitely. Especially within the churches. We have probably recruited, since 1997, when we first began, probably over 400 families that we have recruited. So the families are out there, so there’s really no excuse why, as far as African-Americans, they can’t adopt these children.

Amerson: But just get the families through the process. You know, you can recruit. We started phone call, Friends of Black Children, back in 1980. We had, you go out into the community, you get these families riled up, “I want to adopt, I want to be a foster parent.” But then they get to the system, and they don’t make enough money, they have enough education, their house is not big enough. Then all these barriers come into play, and then these good-natured Christian families, or Muslim families, or whatever kind of families, they get frustrated with the process and say, “Forget this, I don’t need this.”

Lewis: Now cost is also another factor. What are you looking at when it comes to actually adopting?

Horton: Well, as far as with a public agency, there’s really not much, cost-wise. As for a private agency, I don’t deal with the private agencies. I leave that to Miss Amerson.

Amerson: Now, my agencies are private, now, we don’t charge any fees, we are a private agency that functions largely like the public agencies. But for folks who want to adopt infants, the cost to those private agencies can range anywhere from $3,000 and upward to adopt.

Lewis: Now, is there any type of governmental support for families who adopt?

Amerson: Right. They have one called Federal Subsidies, which means that a child, based on the age of the child, from the child welfare system, they will be eligible for a monthly stipend until the child is 18. And I want to make sure folks understand that people are not going into adoption to make some adoption. I mean, the stipend is like $315, I mean, you just can’t get rich on $315, and the highest amount in North Carolina is about $415 for a teenager. But that is just to assist those families and meet the needs of those children. They also are eligible for Medicaid until the child is 18 years old.

Lewis: Mr. Horton, are there any programs available through the General Baptist State Convention to assist those who are adopting?

Horton: Through our program, we do have county volunteers, state volunteers, church volunteers, any kind of volunteers. We basically operate our program solely on them. Especially during this month of November, it’s National Adoption Month, and what we have started was our GBSV adoption Sundays. And through the month of November, we have asked for pastors and for volunteers, especially with pastors, to see if they can dedicate as far as a morning sermon, which could really uplift, as far as adoption. And through that, as far as through this particular campaign, I know we have recruited over 50 families for the adoption. So if the pastor can really uplift as far as adoption during that morning service, or even just talk about two minutes, you can really get the interest from families that can be interested in adoption and foster care.

Lewis: Thank you very much folks. We’ll get back to you in just a moment. But adoption can take on many forms. In this next story we’ll meet a couple who have taken adoption to a different level to show that love has no color.

Narrator: When Dennis and Eugenie Eaborn of Durham made the decision to adopt, they first looked at adopting a child from China. But Eugenie’s biological son Anthony from her first marriage, gave them something to think about.

Anthony: First we had to look at domestic things, and I know there are a lot of needy children and families in the social service department here, in the United States, so I though that would be more beneficial. Also, my older sister, I believe she suggested that to my mother.

Narrator: Sixty-one percent of children awaiting adoption within the North Carolina Department of Social Services are children of color. But for Dennis and Eugenie, race was not an issue when they adopted 13-year-old Letitia, and her seven-year-old brother A.J., over a year ago.

Eugenie: We had an empty house and lots of room, and also heard about lots of kids who needed homes. I think we saw a couple of the “Wednesday’s Child"s on TV. To me it was kind of an obvious choice. Most of the children that we saw on TV were children of color, and my children from my first marriage are children of color, it just seemed quite natural for us to look that way.

Narrator: Even after adopting both Letitia and A.J., Dennis and Eugenie again opened their hearts to become foster parents to an infant and another little girl, both of whom they hope to adopt, and both of whom are African-American. They’ve received mixed responses.

Eugenie: For the most part it’s been pretty positive. We have mostly African-American neighbors, and they were very pleased, and congratulated us. But we have had times where there have been looks, and you can hear comments, sometimes by African-American people who aren’t quite sure what we’re about, and not sure they approve of it.

Narrator: The Eaborns understand the concerns of those who oppose inter-cultural adoption. So they use various avenues to meet the cultural needs of the cultural needs of their children.

Dennis: We belong to an African-American church, which the people there are very, very nice.

Eugenie: They’re wonderful.

Dennis: They are. The children go to church with us, and everything seems to fit together.

Eugenie: We use books, too. We make sure that we provide them with culturally aware books. And it’s not just about African-American to be quite honest with you; we embrace differences, and so we teach them that as long as we continue to educate ourselves and be aware of people’s differences, then racism can’t really hurt us in any way, shape or form. We need to continue to be aware and embrace Christianity, and not allow anyone’s ignorance to affect us.

Letitia: Well, I don’t really feel any difference about it because basically what I feel is as along as I have good, loving parents who can take care of me and give me a good home, to me it really won’t make a difference if they’re different colors.

Lewis: And we’re back with our panel guests: Ruth Amerson, founder and CEO of Another Choice for Black Children Incorporated; and Earl Horton, director of public relations for Adoption and Foster Care Ministry at the General Baptist State Convention.

Miss Amerson, you first. Of course there have been controversies over adoptions of children by children of a different race. Do you see this as an issue?

Amerson: Basically, there are, in that example, where the mom had already had children that were children of color, they already involved with the African-American community and church; there’s some pluses there where the children will be face-to-face with folks that look like that and can provide some additional information to them in terms of who they are in the society. Often times, however, the children who are adopted are usually infants, and they are adopted by families who, they never have an opportunity to see a face that look like them. Often times, those children, and I’m involved with a national organization, and many of those children talked about the pain of growing up in those families when they did not have access and information about what it is to be a black person in America.

So love may be colorblind in a lot of cases, but I think to give children their history, their culture, to teach them, is a challenge for those families who decide to adopt like that.

Horton: I mean, love has no boundary. In my personal opinion, there are a lot of African-American families that can provide that love. Not taking away from that family; they have done a wonderful job as far as expressing their love to their children. But the point that we’re both trying to make, is that there are a lot of African-American families that can do the exact same thing, but the thing is, trying to get those families though the process and have them be matched up with a child.

Lewis: Miss Amerson, another, I guess, side to this coin, how is it that perhaps family members of the children who need to be adopted perhaps don’t take up the lead in order to adopt them?

Amerson: Well, unfortunately, most systems, because of drug abuse in America, many children are coming into care because parents are not making good decisions and they’re being neglected and they’re not being supervised, they’re not getting correct medical care.

So these children are coming to the system, and agencies did not look at the family, grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins, as a viable resource, because they look at this one parent in that family and think, “Everybody has something wrong with them.” So then you have a large and growing population of African-American children in this system. However, and we don’t provide the support. So even when Grandma takes in the children, or aunt and uncle take in the children, they don’t get the level of support that a stranger would get; meaning, folks who are not relatives would get paid a higher stipend, they get all kinds of transportation services, they get all kinds of support services. But when relatives take in these children, they are just given to them, and the agency says, “Bye-bye.”

And many of these relatives will take in more children, if a lot of the support and all the other services they give were being provided for them.

Lewis: Mr. Horton, are there advantages for a child to be placed with a family member instead of with someone they don’t know?

Horton: I just think they have a better connection, as far as with the family member they already know versus someone they have no connection with. It’s going to take time for them to open up, as far as some of these kids, as far as especially with teenagers, it’s going to take awhile to open up. My sister, for example, she was adopted, by my family. We adopted her as an infant. But she’s a teenager now, and she’s just as hard now, as far as trying to contact her, we still do have that brother/sister bash once in awhile, but she knows she’s still loved, everyone in my family loves her just as if she were a biological child. So, the need is great, I’m going to keep on plugging this in, that we need African American families to adopt these African-American children that’s in the system.

Lewis: Miss Amerson, as a matter of fact, your organization has a program that’s being started, promoting African-American men to become foster parents. Tell us a little bit about that.

Amerson: The program is called MECCA, and it’s a one million dollar grant. One of the things that we recognize is that in the African-American community, that African-American men are the last ones to even be considered as adoptive parents. And not that, it’s unfortunate that society has looked black men as though they’re not a valuable resource, and we deliberately say that there a lot of black men who will rise to the occasion. Since we announced that grant, MECCA: Men Embracing Children Collectively through Adoption, we’ve gotten over 25 phone calls from men saying, “Me and my wife want to adopt,” or “I want to be a foster parent,” or “I’m a single black man and I want to adopt.” So the phones have already started ringing. And in three years, our goal is to recruit about 150 black men. That’s not going to be a problem. Our goal is to place 30 children. That’s not going to be a problem. What we’re going to demonstrate through this effort in Charlotte, is that black families, whether or not they’re two-parent or single women or single men, are viable resources to our awaiting children.

Lewis: Mr. Horton, how does the future look for adoption among African-American children?

Horton: Hmm, that’s a good question. I can speak of, as far as in the faith community, I feel that the pastors are very willing and very open, as far as trying to speak the need of adoption as far as to the faith congregations. Within our congregation, as far as with the General Baptist State Convention, we have over 1,600 plus congregations. We have, as far as ample contact, good contact with those pastors. What we’re trying to do is really get into those churches, make presentations, and once you break those barriers, we can really get those families, get them through the process. So I think within the future, I hope that the numbers of African-American children that’s in the system, they will drastically increase, because we really push for one church to adopt one child.

Lewis: How do you go about making sure that these children adjust to their environment, their new environment that is? I’ll direct that to you.

Amerson: You know, preparation for the children and the families. We do all kinds of visits to the children at school and home, and we get information from teachers, from relatives, in terms of making sure the child is okay. We even introduce other children who have been adopted and have that child to meet, just talk about their experience. So we’re trying to make sure that the process is smooth as possible. In North Carolina it takes about six months before an adoption will finalize, so you’ve got some time to work with the family and the child.

Lewis: As far as tax benefits are concerned, what are those benefits?

Amerson: Well, in North Carolina you can get a tax credit for a child, if you adopt a child from a foster care system. So for some families, that’s really, it helps them out. That credit is about five to six thousand dollars.

Lewis: And has it recently increased, I believe, to 10 thousand?

Amerson: It would depend. There have been a lot of changes in the federal government. We’re not really sure what’s going to happen with our whole program, quite frankly. What we tell families is that you’ve got to have a commitment, you can’t depend on federal subsidies, you can’t depend on a lot of things. You just have to depend on yourself on making it work. You have to be committed enough to go out there and take a stand.

Lewis: Just one quick question, very briefly: any advice for people considering adoption? What would you tell them?

Amerson: I would tell them, on Thursday, we’re going to be celebrating Thanksgiving. But in North Carolina there’s some child who’s getting ready to age out of foster care, who’s turning 18 years old, and they’re not going to have a Thanksgiving because they don’t have a place to call home; that we need to change the outcomes for these children, and let them know that all children matter. It doesn’t matter if you are a baby, it doesn’t matter if you’re a teenager, every child deserves a family, every child deserves roots. It’s up to our community to step up to the plate and give those children those roots.

Lewis: Well, I have to close it out here, and I wish we had more time for this. Thank you both, Ruth Amerson and Mr. Horton for being a part of our program. And thank you for watching Black Issues Forum this evening. If you’d like to learn more about tonight’s guests or obtain a transcript of this program, please visit us on-line at www.unctv.org/bif. Or you can call us on with your comments at (919) 549-7167. That’s Black Issues Forum; I’m Mitchell Lewis. Good night.

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